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Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone, Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone, Silence the pianos and with muffled drum Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come. Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead Scribbling on the sky the message He is Dead. Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves, Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves. He was my North, my South, my East and West, My working week and my rest, My noon, my midnight, my talk, my -; I thought that would last forever: I was wrong. The stars are not wanted now; put out every one, Pack up the and dismantle the, Pour away the ocean and sweep up the woods; For nothing now can ever come to any good.. Auden

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Couch Monotony First and foremost, I'm a dad. My child always has and always will come first. I think life is funny. We all make dumb mistakes and if we can't laugh at them then life would be dull. The dumber the mistake, the funnier. I mean, who doesn't laugh when someone smacks their head on something? Oh sure, we all stop and make sure they're okay, but once we know they're fine, it's funny. Don't deny it, you've laughed at someone before. It's okay, we're all friends here :-) I'll come right out and admit it; I'm a hopeless romantic. I'm very happy and content with who I am. I don't feel the need to "fit in" with the crowd and I certainly have nothing to prove to anyone. I don't need a woman in my life and I do not validate myself by how many notches I have on my bedpost. I am always trying to evolve as an individual. I think personal growth is very important. I love honesty...even if it hurts. If my jeans make me look fat (how many guys do you hear say that? Ha!), tell me I look fat. If I make you mad, tell me. Nothing is going to get fixed by trying to avoid hurting my feelings. But, use some tact for goodness sake. I'm going to be honest with you and I expect the same. Physiy, I'm a stocky-built guy. I'm naturally big; broad shoulders, etc. I'll admit to being Athletic but won't be playing any Professional Sports soon! I'm good for picking up heavy objects and cuddling up to on cold nights though ;) I should point out that I have a very dry/sarcastic sense of humor...very in your face. If you don't get me, you're probably going to think I'm an a-hole. I also hate people who use terms like "a-hole" instead of "asshole". It's not like people do not know what you're referring to. Just because you don't hear it with your ears doesn't mean your brain doesn't process it. I don't think sex is a taboo subject to talk about. If you don't think it's ironic that a pleasure zone is located right next to a toxic waste dump then you may not be my type. If you were offended by my last comment, then you are definitely not my type. If you're a girl that's not shy about looking at porn, then we will get along splendidly. Don't get me wrong. Sex is awesome, but it's not everything in a relationship. Let's face it, when we're 70 years old, our looks and sex life is going to be meaningless. It's about connecting with someone on a level where the only thing that matters is being with that person. Besides being honest, kinky and level headed; please know if you're gay or straight. I don't have the time or patience to deal with someone trying to figure stuff like that out. I want someone that knows who they are. Someone that is past the whole "discovering who they are" stage of their lives. I'm loyal and I expect you to be too. I would prefer someone around the ages of 28-48 who is petite to HWP, but there are always exceptions to the rule. I do appreciate all the emails that I receive with nude pictures attached to them, but please have some self-respect. Wait until at least the second email to send those ;-). Okay, I admit it, the only nudie emails I have got are spam. They're not real. Considering this has happened before; I would prefer to know that you ARE real. If you are going to reply to this post then I need you to stop and look around the room you're in. Pick one item (i.e. lamp, sofa, etc). Once you have that write down the first word that comes into your mind. Got it? Awesome. That is what I would like for you to use for your email's subject line. Yeah, it's corny, but it's kind of fun.

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